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Showing posts from October, 2014

face the Fear of Uncertainty

This past Friday I took a trip to a Haunted Ropes Course at Eagle Bluff Environmental Learning Center. I know. Not only was it a high ropes course, but a HAUNTED high ropes course! What was I thinking?!?!? I haven't been on a course like this since my ninth grade Wolf Ridge trip, but it was on my adventure list and my sister-in-law was brave enough to help me experience it. The night was perfect.  The perfect fall temperature to be outdoors.  The evening light let us enjoy the view of our beautiful surroundings while we took deep breaths at each courage-gathering platform, high in the trees. I didn't know what to expect so fear was lying just under the surface, waiting for me to give over and think about it too much.  But, I also knew I could do it.  I was calm even as the rope swayed and my balance was challenged.  I just had to slow down and be even more intentional in my moments. We finished the course with a feeling of relief and empowerment.  A big high-five and

Strong and Gentle

This week I have been reverting back to the old habits of do, do, doing. Man, it gets tough when I get in one of these ruts. I become consumed with my list and getting things done.  My day is run on high, my adrenaline coursing.  I push and push to get one more thing done.  I don't sit until the kids get to bed and then I grab a glass of wine and collapse.  Too tired to feel peaceful or content. What gets me to this place? Why do I let myself go this far? Here's what I know...   I have taken a break from yoga and moments of quiet.  My journal has only been opened to collect quotes that I will look at "when I have time."  My daily walk has been another thing to check off the list and is more about my dog's energy level than my happiness.  I am searching blogs and checking out books from the library for answers instead of listening to my own wisdom. Resentment and overwhelm build and build when I am in this space, which makes it hard to live with me.  I am

Trying something new

I started a painting class. I am starting to paint. Yes! And Yikes?!?! It has been something that I have felt called to learn more about, so I signed up for a very general class that welcomed beginners.  The first day, I found myself surrounded by a talented, patient teacher, three very senior-aged women, and a teenager.  It was an interesting bunch and I wasn't really sure what I was in for.  The teacher joked that the highlight of coffee and snacks would be coming in an hour, so, if nothing else, I could enjoy a treat. I wasn't prepared.  I didn't have any tools with, but the teacher was so gracious and soon I was spreading water all over the paper and starting to stain with red, yellow, and blue.  The older crowd diligently worked on their projects as us "young folks" were given lessons in watercolor and pencil. I was inspired by the work of the women.  I wanted to learn more about their lives and where in their journey they had picked up painting.  O

be in the moment

Yesterday I went on a field trip to the Science Museum Butterfly Tent with my son's K-1 class.  It was a joy!  It was amazing! The butterflies were crazy!  They were everywhere and on everything!  They were on our fingers, backs, hair, shoes.  They landed on benches and the ground.  Every move involved a double-check to be sure that we weren't squashing a delicate creature.  It was a big task for 5-7 year olds to be so careful.  The kids were patient, slow, curious, watchful, excited, and some were overwhelmed. I understood.  It was unnerving to feel the small feet on my head; the flutter right by my face.  It was a surprise when someone pointed out that a butterfly was taking a ride on your back and you hadn't felt it there. I wanted to document it all.  I wanted to capture the vibrance of the color, the flowers, and the joy of the children.  I watched my son with butterflies on each hand and one resting on his forehead and wanted to get a shot.  I wanted to shoot t

Mud and muck

In the past two days, I have had two experiences with dogs and mud! Dogs and mud! Can you picture it? Black mud-coated legs. A black nose. Mud streaks. Mud-caked. Pawprints. Enough to make my head blow off with the steam radiating from me as I looked out and saw my pup proudly standing over the mud bog that he had made.  And then I found myself in it again!  This time it wasn't my own rambunctious, unbearable-at-times puppy, but a total stranger dog that I came upon on the side of the road! I ask myself how I got into these predicaments and I just have to laugh or I might give up and cry. In hindsight, I am certain that the lost dog was probably just out for his daily run.  I was the lucky sucker who thought he needed to be rescued.  My attempts to do a good deed led to a disconnected phone number, a failed attempt to keep him in the backend of my car, and paw prints everywhere!  He probably loved the excitement and attention and when I drove away in search of his hom