"May what I do flow from me like a river, no forcing and no holding back." -Rilke I wanted to write a little more about what was underneath the last post. What I continue to need to hear again and again. It is the promise to resist urgency. I feel urgency in my body as a tightening. It is a tightness in my breath. It is a tightness in my expression. I find that my brain can get consumed with uncertainty, comparison, and fear. It feels like there is a buzzing in my back that scares me into thinking that if I don't get to all of my ideas soon, then I will lose them, fall behind, miss an opportunity, and not be successful. I know in my heart that this isn't true. The truth is that the feeling of urgency is fear and it isn't reality. When I feel the anxiety of uncertainty, I start to cling to my old ways. I try to gather more information, look to
creating openings so love & intuition have room to grow