Skip to main content

Up until now...





Last wkend, I ran my first 5K.  It came after a month and a half of training and a lot of days when I thought "how will I ever be able to keep going?"
I have never considered myself to be a runner.  In fact, "I'm not a runner" would be one of those statements that I have used to define myself for a long time.
So, when I pulled up to the registration table and received my t-shirt and number, I had to think again.  Could I change my statement now?  Am I a runner?  Is this something that I will continue?  Do I belong in this crowd and is running one of my things?
I set this 5K goal for myself a while ago (even as I told myself I wasn't a runner).  Maybe it was a way to push my body and see how it would perform.  Maybe it was just another way to fill time.  Maybe I envied the group who could start their Sat. morning by running the local 5K.  Whatever led me to do it, it was another goal and I am pretty good at pushing myself when I set a goal.
Now that I finished the challenge, I have to really sit back and think about running.  Up until now, I wouldn't consider myself a runner.  Now, I get to decide if running is something that brings me joy.

"Up until now" is a new idea for me.
It's a new way to check myself when I automatically go to one of those defining statements that really don't fit anymore.

Up until now, I have always followed through on my commitments.  Now, I am finding that it's ok to back out when your life changes or you realize you have set other priorities.
Here are some more...
Up until now, I wasn't good at making phone calls.
Up until now, I didn't have the confidence I needed to sell my skills and abilities.
Up until now, I haven't been able to ask for what I need without guilt.

Some of these statements will help launch the new goals that I set for myself.  Thinking this way might lead me toward the skills that I would like to acquire and a redefinition of who I am.

Up until now, I was afraid I would feel like an imposter if I stood at the starting line with "runners."  Now I know that if I choose to keep running, I will fit in just fine.

Think about one of the statements you use to define yourself 
and decide whether it is ready for a shift.  Maybe you can switch to "Up until now, I ... "

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Letting go & holding on- how you can do both at the same time

Everyday I am thinking about letting go.  My days are spent in sessions with clients, or reading about decluttering tips, or writing blog posts, all in an effort to support clients as they let go of clutter and unwanted habits.  Letting go is something that I have made into my life's work, but never is it more "in my face" than when I sit with my grandma at the nursing home.  My grandma has Dementia/Alzheimers.  I don't even know what or which or why or how, but I do know that it seems we have lost her to the disease and letting go & holding on are happening all at once. As I sit and watch her sleep, I can stroke her hand and feel the many memories of playing Go to the Dump or Crazy Eight on my days off of Kindergarten, getting a home perm in her kitchen in elementary school, and painting my nails at her kitchen nook in H.S.  I remember learning how to snap a dish towel with my cousins as we cleaned up from holiday gatherings & singing and dancing...
2 comments
Read more

Creativity

This summer has been a journey in the pursuit of my creative person!  It started with the desire to seek a new path, to try on some new ways of thinking, and to shift a bit from the usual patterns.  My soul was yearning to make more time for creativity, so I have been using the past two months to honor that spirit in me. I thought that I would start from the very beginning-try putting myself through an elementary art class.  That meant going through a step-by-step process of learning how to draw, watercolor, use oil pastels, paint, etc.  I got started with a kid's art book from the library and a trip to The Sketchy Artist.  I bought a few supplies and sat down to start my lessons. The lessons didn't last.  I am completely interested in playing around with all of the supplies and trying out techniques, but I found a rigid plan to "be creative" isn't what I need. What I am coming to understand is that creativity is more than an art class.  Creativity ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Milestones

Milestones are interesting.   They are a marker in time.   A stopping point.   A time for evaluation & reflection. 40 years on this Earth.   It seems like a lot of time & yet… often it feels like those forty years just gave me a start on the path.   They were my learning and growing years.  My trying on and figuring out years.   Lots of contemplation & frustration.   Lots of wonder & growth, but lots of inner struggle over who I am and how I want to live.   Growing older can be a tough road for some.  For me, it has been a journey to find & stay true to my inner truth, my inner core.  40 years of experiences that have given me a lot of perspective & understanding into my place, my gifts, my beliefs.  I feel like this milestone has given me permission to move forward with less angst and more trust.  Less questioning and more knowing....
Post a Comment
Read more